George Bush.

In which The Joker goes shopping for a material of concealment to hide Master Dent's face from innocent onlookers, obtains one, and then presents it to said offender.

~ ~

Well, the first choice would have to be Costco. Costco always had everything and in sizes no one needed but figured, 'What the hell, I love these little Jalapeno Poppers. Why not get my bodyweight in them so I'll never run out.' The Joker took note of this as he strolled through the giant ass parking lot. Everything was big here. Everything. This made the man chuckle as he walked through the doors, ignoring the greeting of the man standing next to it.

He walked to the checkout aisles and invaded the personal space of a young cashier. "'scuse me, miss. Where might a fellow find the *creepy lick of lips* bags?"

The girl blinked as she tried to find her voice. "I...um... aisle three?"

Aisle three it was. Passing various items of uninterest, The Joker started to wonder if they really did sell everything at Costco. If so, he could use a six pack of Maschinengewehr 37s and bombs- Ah, the bags! He rifled through them, shaking his head to some and speaking out loud. "Too floral. Too pasty. Too bleak. Too thin. Too..."

He stood in front of them for a long while. With a frustrated sigh, he finally walked back to the cashier register (but not without picking up a double set of lawnchairs and six packs of pencils. It was amazing how fast one ran out of those buggers when performing one's special magic trick). "Well, miss, you were of no help regarding the bags situation. I think Imma just steal some of these back here." He reached over the register and grabbed some Costco bags. "Thank you and have a nice day." He started to walk towards the door.

"Hey, you need to pay for those lawnchairs and pencils!"

The Costco representatives began to panic. Someone not paying for their Costco items? Unheard of! They sold everything at unnecessary sizes and numbers so they could get paid more!

The Joker turned around. "Relax, redvests. I left you a tip by the... tent aisle." He disappeared. Random personell filed to the tent area, expecting to see a hefty sum of cash. The manager shouldered his way inside a suspicious looking tent, only finding a fake campfire inside of it with a note.

'Imma roast me some marshmallows.'

"What the hell do you suppose that means?"

In the parking lot, the button was pressed and bits of Costco were either blown sky-high or smouldering.

~

Nothing had changed for The Joker as he returned to his current residence. He could hear Dent wailing somewhere in the back, probably watching re-runs of Desperate Housewives or Entourage and relating them to Rachel in any way, shape, or form.

Discarding of his stolen items, The Joker settled on deciding which bag would be appropriate for the needed task. "Paper's good, very good... Conceals pretty well," he mumbled with a chuckle before holding up a plastic bag. "But plastic..."

He let that one sit for a moment.

In came Dent, looking for all the world like a disfigured girl who had just been dumped by her boyfriend. "What if R-Rachel had an affair like the woman in Desperate Housewives... W-what if she still loved BAAAAAATMAAAAAAAAAAN!!"

The Joker cast a blank look over his shoulder before smiling. "Say, Denty Dear, wanna do me a favor?"

Harvey shook his head. "N-no! Every-everytime I do something with you someone ends up dead, or the police are called, or that stupid BATMAN appears. T-then you two fight and I stand in the corner and cry about Rachel because he always says something that reminds me of her! I loved her, b-but I am not obsessed with her!" He glanced at the lawnchairs. "Rachel used to sit in lawnchairs and sip lemon tea... I KNEW IT WAS LEMON TEA BECAUSE IT WAS YELLOW! WAAAAC-"

"No, no nothing like that," The Joker made sure to cut him off before he could rise an octave. "Just a simple... favor. Close your eyes."

Harvey stared at him in offense. "You know I can only close one eye."

"Close your eye then, Dent," The Joker growled. He was in no mood for Harvey's Nagging Nancy routine. Always bitching about the same thing... It was his problem, actually his fault for his whole face trauma. He'd apologized, hadn't he? He'd said no hard feelings which was a form of apology!

Pouting audibly, Harvey did as he was told, even making it easier by turning around. Grinning, The Joker placed a paper bag over his face, before taking his shoulders and turning him around. "There. Don't you feel a little less hideous?"

"No-"

"Excellent! Now we'll both be happy, and when we're both happy, everyone's happy!" The Joker smiled, patting Harvey on his bagged head. "Now get outta my way." He pushed past him to go work on some more Batman plans.

Harvey took a moment to just stand still and mentally confirm his new biggest humiliation. This bag was not just a bag anymore, oh no. It was an Belittling Anonymity Guise, one of the many sources of Harvey Dent's personal anguish, suffering, and pain.

Which could only mean that he was now a real supervillain!

The Joker had recognized his amazing ability to be a sidekick and had given him a mask! Now they could really take the Batman out together!

Things were looking bright for Harvey Dent. "Wow, a real sidekick to The Joker," he said, pulling out his coin from his pocket. "I'll be the most evil sidekick ever! Like that Professor Chaos guy!"

He laughed, or attempted to laugh, evilly. Until he dropped the quarter.

"..."

With the bag over his head, there was no way to see where it was. Without his most precious item of torture, how was he supposed to be a supervillain sidekick now!?

There was only one thing to go back to. Storming into The Joker's station, Harvey Dent belted out his one-sided, repetitive record. "RACHEL USED TO PUT THE GROCERIES IN SHOPPING BAGS! SHE ARRANGED THE TOMATOES JUST SO AND THE LETTUCE AND CELERY ALONG THE SIDES AS TO MAKE SPACE FOR OTHER EDIBLE OR NEEDED ITEMS! WAAAAAAACHEEEEEL!"

It was a good try, Joker.

So I've been in a bit of a slump recently. With writing and among other things. Luckily, I've been drawing a lot and it gets better and better everyday! It only looks like shit when I color it, so I think I'm gonna stick to different shades of pencils for the next few weeks. (It always looks better, in my opinion anyway)

Um, let's seeeeee... We went to Frighttown last week. That was epic. Just a bunch of teenagers running around downtown Portland without parental supervision. Always fun.

Other good news! I auditioned for One Acts at our school, which is just basically little 4-5 page scenes that you perform for ... somebody... And I got a part! I get to play Lom, who is some big burly man stuck in a barrel and is, in my opinion, pretty funny. Sweet, yeah? The script's over on my buffet, I'll have to give some insight to it later.

I've hit a brick wall with Either Or. I get so lazy.... I just stopped putting any effort into it. So I decided to take a break and write some funny stuff to take my mind off of it. I was talking to my pal Emma the other night about Batman, or rather, we were RPing it. She's The Joker, of course, Knives is Batman. and I get to be Two-Face. Which means I get to bitch about my Wachel and then toss coins around. I got thinking about some possible humor fics I could relate off of that and got A LOT.

So I settled on HD TV: Harvey Dent Television. A program made exclusively by Harvey Dent, narrated (for the most part) by Harvey Dent, and rated by The Jok- er, Harvey Dent.

I'm going to try and type up a sample in a next post and see how it goes!

Jack Spice was a character I made sometime this summer that I really REALLY REALLY took a liking and a loathing to. I mean,honestly, playing an emo boy with a billion problems is totally rad and totally bogus at the same time. Although, it gives me the perfect opportunity to be serious and take things into a new perspective.

Jack has major issues. ZOMG, advertisement for a site of ours at the same time?! NOWAY!

This scene takes place at Hogwarts (yes, laugh it up, I'm on an HP site...) and Jack is sitting with Amalia Gunn of whom he just met. They have periods where they get along, but I'm too lazy to post the ENTIRE thread and I'm positive you don't want to read all of that anyways. Jack has a history of being very bipolar and unpredictable, so it was kind of fun to write this but at the same time very hard. For more insight about it, either contact me or read this

And, of course, there's Donnie darko in there too. IMEANDUH.

~ ~


Amalia seemed surprised at his answer and then calm about it. Jack bit the inside of his arm, looking up at her curiously. “I suppose so… but if... but if you want to die I suppose that’s reasonable…” He snorted here. Of course he didn't want to die.

“Dying, that’s reasonable, everyone dies. And wanting to die is reasonable, I suppose. But being done isn’t enough. If you’re going to give everything up, even if you don’t actually have anything you have possibilities, if you give all that up… you should, I would think, have a deep desire to be dead, not just being done. Are you done with life… or with your life? Because if you’re done with life then fine… but your life… you can make a new life for yourself, one you like better.”

Jack sighed, ending his withering stare that was directed at her; instead distracting himself by fishing in his pocket. "Look, I appreciate your concern, but don't try to bullshit me with some therapist speech," he muttered, pulling a cigarette from his pocket and a lighter from the other.

“But I suppose maybe you’d want to take care of Sean. It seems a driving force.”

That hit a nerve for some reason. Jack stared at her, cigarette dangling and smoldering between his lips loosely. He didn't really like to be related to and he had been told by a lot of people, mostly therapists, that that was because he didn't enjoy reaching out. Which, in some ways, was true but Jack always felt that his therapists, psychiatrists, remaining friends what have you were never really telling things that he needed, or wanted, to hear.

Yes, he had to take care of Sean and be the responsible older brother. Yes, he had to work things out with the court and get cleaned up enough so he could actually take care of his brother. Most of the time he felt that he had grown up too fast, or never really grew up at all. Sure, he'd had a childhood but that had been dedicated to cutting or cooking drugs, running away for nights on end with Sean, and being used for his parents' drug money. He really wanted, more than anything in the world, to be a kid for a day and mess around with someone. Have a true friend and a true life.

He suddenly smirked, making a low noise of amusement under his breath as he looked at her. His expression softened even though the muscles in his back tensed until they were almost taut. He was being horrid to Amalia, he knew that. He was amused, however, because he had forgotten to take his medication that morning which explained his moodswings. He also realized, which made it even more entertaining for him, that he really needed to stop using his medication as an excuse.

He took a long drag of his cigarette, relaxing as the Nicotine started to set in. "You know, there was this Muggle movie that I used to watch all the time as a kid," he said after a moment, looking down at his shoes. "It was called Donnie Darko and the boy in it had a lot of problems, sorta like me. And, I dunno, I always felt really bad for him because he said things that made so much d**n sense and everyone thought he was just psycho. He had to go to therapy too and he had an imaginary friend that was a rabbit." He paused to take another drag of his cigarette, blowing the smoke away from her in case she didn't like the smell. "I think he was a schizophrenic, I can't remember. I haven't seen that movie in so long. I used to relate to it a lot, especially when I was little. I loved it. So my dad, to punish me for doing something bad once... He threw it away and said I couldn't watch it anymore." He shrugged, sniffing slightly from the smell of smoke. "It was okay though. I mean, it's not like I didn't remember anything about it. I just remembered what the old lady in the movie, Roberta Sparrow or Grandma Death, told Donnie a little after the beginning of the movie. She said that every living thing dies alone and Donnie was afraid to die alone."

Jack stayed quiet for a moment, fighting back his tears again. "And when he said that towards the end of the movie, I really felt like I knew what he was talking about, you know? Because-because I don't want to die alone either. I don't want to die at all. I just say I do because I guess a part of me does, but the rest of me is just too scared." He wiped his eyes, feeling on the verge of a breakdown. "The therapist in the movie, she said to Donnie that if they sky were to fall down and everything were to basically turn to shit, there'd only be you and your memories and all the people you've touched. But I don't really have a lot of good memories and I haven't really reached out or touched a lot of people. I just... I just don't know how to. So I came to terms a long time ago that all I needed was myself and that I'm destined to be alone forever. To die alone."

Jack wanted to stop talking but it was all coming out in a rush. He was scared now that he had revealed too much to Amalia and it would come back to bite him in the ass later. Presently, however, he felt like a faucet with a broken handle. Gushing and gushing. He started to cry using it to relapse into a childlike state, which was the only time he could feel like a kid; irresponsible, small, and vulnerable. He never did this in front of Sean or his parents however. "I d-don't want to die alone," he choked, repeating himself. "I don't want t-to die... at all!"

He stopped, looking at her wide-eyed though his tears still fell. "I want to live forever... and be like a God, or at least a super hero..." He nodded slowly, feeling like he was talking mostly to himself. "And be invincible."

Jack hissed suddenly as his cigarette burned his fingers, not realizing he had forgotten about it. He dropped it, using the now-sensitive areas on his fingers to come back to himself. He panted slightly and trembled. That , whatever it had been, had never happened before. He looked at Amalia in a slight panic. "I... I'm sorry. I don't know why..." He felt ashamed and embarrassed. "I should just leave you alone." He started to shift, planning to get away from her which was probably what she wanted him to do.

A side story of my story (haha) in response to Donnie Darko.

“What do you think about death?” Maddie asked as he took another drag of his cigarette. Lu was in obvious pain as he watched the other boy, sweat beading on his forehead. He knew that Maddie wasn't going to do anything about his discomfort so he just wrapped his arms around his stomach and looked thoughtful. The magic was working against the cigarette resin and ash, protecting Maddie's lungs from a smoky fate. Maddie narrowed his eyes, nudging him pointedly. “Hey, I asked you something.”

Lu sighed, slipping his eyes closed. “I think that death can be a form of escape if it needs to be. Otherwise... it's like slipping out of a pair of uncomfortable shoes.” He blinked as the pain rolled like waves through his system. Maddie softened his gaze as he turned towards the other boy. “What?” Lu shrugged rolling over onto his side and looking at the wall. “I mean, it's not like you're afraid of shoes. But a lot of people are afraid of death. If I ruled the world and could say one thing, only one thing to the people, I would tell them not to be afraid.” The cigarette smoldered in Maddie's fingers as he moved closer. “Why?” Lu looked back at him with a small smile. “Because when you die you're going somewhere new and exciting. There's so much controversy about what death is actually like, but it can't be all that bad. So,” he sat up to explain his thoughts better, leaning back on his elbows. “Back to the shoe theory. Cramped and uncomfortable, probably tight and restricting. That's like the fear of death. But if you get past that, and you slip out of that shoe, it's a lot more...” He fell silent, pressing his thumb to the corner of his mouth as he thought. “It's a lot more reassuring.”

They sat in silence for a long time. Lu wondered if this was the best thing to be telling Maddie. He knew the other boy was afraid of death yet he didn't want to live. His thoughts were interrupted when the pain stopped. He looked up to see Maddie had stopped smoking, his cigarette lying stubbed out next to him. “So, talk to me,” he said quietly. Puzzled, Lu angled his head. “What?” Maddie looked down at his hands, red hair creating a barrier between their eyes. “Tell me that it's going to be okay when I die.”

Lu understood. How long had it been since they had met in that alleyway? Three years? Four? Who knew. He shifted into a sitting position, taking Maddie's hands. He really meant it this time. “It's going to be okay. When you die nothing bad will happen.”

“How do you know?” Lu shrugged, averting his gaze. “I don't exactly, but I'm confident in my opinion.” A silence stretched between them before he spoke again. “If you could give death a new name, what would it be?”

Maddie sighed, taking his hands away from the paler boy's. “I would call it life.” He brought his knees up and rested his elbows on top of them. “Life? Why?”

Resting his head against the edge of his bed, it was his turn to give Lu a small smile. “Because if what you say is true, then it's like starting a new life. New and exciting. When you're born, essentially everyone claims you're starting a new life. You're alive. And when you die, you just die. No one really defines death, save for it being scary and lonely and cold. Or it's described as being pure with people you once knew at one point.” He rubbed the side of his face. “But when you die aren't you just really being born into a new life?”

Both boys looked up at the ceiling for a long while. Lu rested his head against Maddie's shoulder, half-lidding his eyes. “Then are you ready to be born again?”

Another silence filled the cluttered room. A streetlight flickered outside and went out, submerging the room in darkness. Maddie nodded in the black. “Yes. I am.” They remained that way for the rest of the night, chests rising and falling in sync with the other until that, too, stopped.

Kumoricon was very exciting! What a blast! So many Axels and Roxas... Roxass? Roxi? Whatever. Plus, there were so many Tobis I just knew Charles would have hated any sort of anime convention.

Yes, I hugged a Tobi to contradict popular belief. He's annoying, but the kid sure knows how to entertain.

The only thing I got tired of was that stupid Caramel dance... Yes, it's cute. To an extent. Then you're wondering what the hell- no, WHO the hell came up with a dance like it. It didn't help that I was sent a youtube video of Seto Kaiba and Mokuba doing the Caramel dance. I'd add a link, but it's quite scarring. ... and I can't find it...

There was a rave, which was awesome. And a pirate vs. ninja dance off which I participated in. And The Slants who were awesome. There was also parents at the con, who were very, very out of their element. We played Apples to Apples with a really cool anime mom and her son and daughter. We made our own AtA card which was Parents At Con: Confused, disoriented, overwhelmed etc.

Jeez, there was so much. I'm so tired xDD It's been a long weekend. I'm a little bit sick too, so that didn't help early yesterday when we had to go. So far I haven't thrown up anything (you really needed to know what, I'm sure) but I'm being careful nevertheless. I hate throwing up...

Bought a ton of yaoi thanks to Emily who cosplayed an awesome Roxas, so I'll be sure to talk about some of it in later posts. My favorite book so far is Family Complex . It combines teenage angst with hilarity so it's not all 'boohoo Ai sew emo.' Plus, the mom and dad are hilarious.

I'm going to go watch Fight Club. Or something, I dunno. I really don't feel well... =( I'll try to post later if there's anyone I need to do that for!

Toodles!

Uke-chan

Finally started writing this morning. God, it felt so good... Orgasm typing or story writing? I do believe it's possible. I haven't actually written anything hardcore in like, three years maybe more, so getting back on the ball feels incredible.

I started out with some character profiles, one before and one after I wrote the first chapter, which really helped developing them in the story. I'm too lazy to post them right now, but I'll do it later.

I SO HAPPEH!!

Fly.

For this story plot, I still don't have a name yet and am just going to be writing, or I should say typing, ideas and other things that pop up. I'm going to ignore spelling and grammar mistakes and just write down what I think and feel so this story can come out wonderful.

I want Tae'halu, the death apprentice, to be a bit shy. Maybe almost awkward. Being an apprentice, he still doesn't know that much and is still learning though he has the basics down pretty well. The object of the story, or rather the whole general gist of it, is the sense of protection and knowing that you're not the only one who suffers. By inflicting pain onto the shy and awkward Tae'halu, the suicidal teenager (for he doesn't have a name right now) will realize he's not just the one that suffers. He will also see how others suffer and it's not all about him. He won't feel so alone.

ST (suicidal teenager) should have a slightly rowdy personality. I still want him to be reserved enough to be a slight asshole. Obviously at first he won't care that Tae'halu suffers for him, thinking it's the only way anyone can live.

*thinking of a name for ST right now*

So far, with the help of my parents, I've narrowed them down to some uni-sexual names: Stevie, Robbie, or Madison.

Out of those three I really like Madison. It can be shortened into Maddie or Mattie.

Tae'halu, who will be called Lu for short, and Madison, or Maddie.

The title just came to me. I'm going to run with it, and call it Either Or.

Yes, I believe in ghosts. It just seems a little strange to have all these dead people on the planet who just go where ever they go without scaring some people.

I don't think I've really encountered them, but I always do feel strange presences in my house at night. Especially at my old house which was super big. So I don't really think they're ghosts as much as... friendly passerbys or something. They've never hurt or scared me, so we just leave each other alone.

I finally settled on a story plot that MAKES SENSE this morning!!

I mean, sure, this may sound like a small thing but I've been struggling to think up a real storyline with actual characters and ideas for a little over a year and half, and it's one I feel pretty confident about and am not just going to dismiss it as a stupid idea later. I'm harder on myself than I think, I think...

Ooo, double I think. Positive or negative?

Anyway, I just have the skeleton of the story right now and am slowly adding to it like I was this morning. It's about a suicidal teenager (seems to be a lot of those around, huh?) who get a death apprentice (further explained later, it's still a skeleton so not everything even makes sense to me) who guards him from death by using magic on him. The only catch is that this magic puts the death apprentice in serious danger of dying himself, giving the boy a chance to see pain and suffering from a different perspective.

And of course I made them both boys for a reason. You Utensils know what I mean. ;-)

I don't know what I'm going to name the suicidal boy but I like Tae'halu for the death apprentice. I'm still building on it, but I like it so far. It seems original enough to be satisfactory with the magic, spirits, and guardian plot but still different enough to be unpredictable.

YAY, MY BRAIN'S NOT DEAD!

I think I'd have to say Holden Caulfield, just to see what the hell his problem is. He'd open up to me.

And if he didn't I'd hit him with coconuts.

Dear god... I'm sorry, it's just that having both of these men staring at you at the same time is very flattering yet highly unnerving. Never thought I'd see them on the same page either.

Before I begin, I just want to clarify that this is entirely my opinion and how I see the way villains are. I'm not some big-shot author who's telling you what to think, so please don't take it that way xD! I do want to know what you think though.

Of course, we watched The Silence of the Lambs last night (after Duelstrike fell asleep, mind you. She would have no Hannibal while she was awake). I've seen Dark Knight twice and each time I watch it Heath gives me chills and Christian and Aaron manage to heat those chills up. Yeah, Morgan Freeman helps too, only it's a... smaller, more subdued flame. But it got me thinking that if there was a random cage match, or some smart-a-thon, who would win? The Joker or Hannibal Lecter? I imagine most people would say Lecter, dude, he eats people, but under all that make-up The Joker has a devious brain. That may even rival the cannibal psychiatrist.

SO. Who is more sinister?

The Joker has been with us all for years in the popular Batman comics and he is, as Emma and I like to put it, crazy. He makes it well known he's not all for money and only does certain things for the pleasure (and possibly the power). Because he can, and because he's a guy who likes to have fun. A little too much fun if you're Christian Bale who runs all over the city and tries to stop him. Have fun, Christian. You'll probably be doing it for the rest of your life.

I think part of what makes The Joker a beloved character is how twisted and unpredictable he is. He doesn't play by the rules, obviously, and he doesn't even abide by his own rules. Like Lecter, The Joker drops hints in frustrating clues and pieces (making it hard on Christian. Spot on, lad, you'll get him eventually) which adds suspense because there's always someone trapped that needs to be saved because she can't do it on her own and she wants to get married to you even though she's a total BITCH and still likes Batman-

'scuse me. I was thinking of someone else.

The other reason why people go gaga for Joker today is the wonderful Heath Ledger. A gay cowboy and a crazy clown? Let's face it, the man's a genius. The sad part too is that with the role of The Joker under his belt, no doubt Heath would have been sky-rocketed to fame. Why'd you go and do that, Mr. Ledger? =(

Overall, The Joker is a man who pulls off style, crazy class, and a purple suit.

Hannibal Lecter is by far my favorite villain in the entire world, even against The Joker I'm sad to say. I think because he doesn't really seem like a villain it makes his character all the more interesting. He was very polite to Clarice (God knows she didn't deserve it, I HATE Clarice Starling) and even to his security guards. To be perfectly honest, he was an asshole. A big, smart, charming asshole. A wonderful example? After he spoke to the Senator who's daughter was missing he told her he loved her suit.

An asshole-ish remark that would have been seen as a compliment had the time been appropriate.

Lecter speaks in riddles and clues as well, but in exchange for information he made Clarice tell him personal things about herself. So he prays on self-information and then uses it as a weapon later. Jack Crawford even told Clarice in the beginning of both the book and the movie, "The last thing you want is Hannibal Lecter inside your head."

And being a psychiatrist, how could he not have that ability? The Joker exhibited his hand at this method when he was in the cell with one of the police officers and started talking about how he knew some of the man's dead friends better than he did.
He was able to see his true colors. And look where it got him? (Not spoiling it for those who haven't seen it!)

The art of manipulation is a classic villain attribute. I really think it's how the manipulation is delivered that determines the sinister level of the villain. Both Lecter and The Joker are smooth about it, smooth enough to get to people.

So who's more sinister?

... I really don't know. I think it's a tie, honestly! I like Lecter more than The Joker, I can tell you that. Nothing against Heath, it's just that Lecter was my first twisted love and it's always going to be that way I believe. I'm glad he has competition that makes me think!

GO SEE THE DARK KNIGHT AND READ/WATCH THE SILENCE OF THE LAMBS IF YOU HAVEN'T, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!!!!!

Love to me means something or someone that knows what you do and don't like, knows how to handle you when you're being a brat, and, above all, put up with you no matter how you're acting.

That or someone with free food. That's love right there.

Jesus, WEIRD dream last night... You know how you have those weird ones that are super scary when you wake up in the dark with them fresh in your mind, but later as you're explaining it to someone it just sounds fucking retarded? Like the one Daniel Tosh explains?

This one was like that!

Okay, so I was in some weird hybrid mixture of our riding barn and some giant building thing with Sami Warner, my old friends from primary and elementary school, and Jade and we were all watching little kids jump over horse jumping poles like they usually do at our club. And-and Austin Hansen was there and he was peeling a peach, but it didn't look like a peach, it looked more like a persimmon or a mango! But he said it was a peach!

So I went out back with Jade to watch some sort of furniture giveaway because they're was a GIANT SALE and you HAD TO BUY NOW! And we both started feeling really horny so we had to find a bathroom but the only bathroom that was there was the one near a Walmart and we didn't want to go to it, so we forgot about it and instead went into the horse arena to watch the jumping kids. And my friend Nyeri was jumping horse poles and wearing pink and I was all, "What are you doing?" and she didn't answer me, so we just ignored her.

Then Sami Warner comes up to me dressed in a coach's outfit and starts talking about something I can't even remember, but I do remember that all of the kids started to line up in rows like in I, Robot. And suddenly it was like we were in Silent Hill and we couldn't touch the frozen kids or they'd eat us or something and I was dressed like someone from Stargate and Jade and Sami both had some sort of Princess Leia curls on either side of their heads. And the kids came to life and started shooting at us with guns, so I shot them back and then this giant gorilla busted through the main door dressed in a T-shirt and started killing everybody!

So-so I ushered Jade and Sami into a bathroom (that just appeared and it was uni-sexual) and we tried to hide, but the gorilla opened the door so we ran out the other door but the gorilla saw us there too so we ran back into the bathroom! And as the gorilla was knocking down the bathroom door, we escaped using an alternate door which led to the giant ass furniture sale-

And then I woke up.

...sooo, let's see, burritos lead to pretty girls getting hung and deep-fried shrimp leads to... whatever you want to call this.

I-THINK-I-NEED-A-SHRINK-OR-SOMETHING!!!!

Jeans, a dark shirt like MCR or Entrust, and some sort of evil-looking belt.

AND DON'T FORGET MY SPANDANA, BITCH, along with Converse or Vans shoes. Got it?

Overview Journal:

Doing good, a little sore. Fell off another damn pony today... Is it just me or do they just seem to hate me? This one was slightly bigger and stockier so it wasn't like falling off of Kastle. His name's Hagar and he's still just a baby. It would have been acceptable had he not tried to step on me when I fell off. Being my agile Elven/Rocker/Black/...um.../Manly self I rolled out of the way and avoided getting my hip stepped on. Only bad news is that I landed on my bad shoulder, which is now clicking and feeling a little too loose for comfort...

GRATE SONDEH, ORLY?!

It's weird, everytime we go to the State Fair something happens to my right shoulder... is this some sort of omen from Oregon tell me to GTFO!?

Went to the fair yesterday with Duelstrike. Had a great time. We went on rides and saw the animals, etc. And most importantly ate a lot of crap. That's the best part about the fair. I will say that I am quite concerned with the number of people who were in automobiles. Not for, like, an injury or something but because they didn't want to walk. I have realized, thanks to Health class, that America certainly has an obesity problem, but good lord taking a scooter to the fair because you don't want to walk!? It's totally different if you have a disorder and you absolutely CANNOT walk, but I mena come on, it's a FAIR. How lazy can you get?

Kumoricon's next week. We're all very excited. The shirts are coming along great. We just finished the transfer paper up yesterday and mine came out a bit cloudy 'cause I didn't keep it ironed on there long enough I think, but we're going to decorate with fabric paints etc. so I'll bold it up. Lots o' fun!

Serious Thoughts:

None, actually. I've been having a good week.

A Funny Break

I'm sure Duelstrike can elaborate, but I attempted to bite her on a specific ride at the fair. It's the Sea Dragon, you know, the one that makes your stomach go all screwy. My stomach gets so tickled I have to bite people. Don't ask why, it's a habit, and I've done it ever since I was little. My mom has refused to sit next to me on that ride if go on it at all.

She wouldn't let me bite her yesterday, or hold her hand, so I had to suffer in silence. ...as silent as, "HOLD MY HAND, I PROMISE I WON'T BITE YOU!" can be.

Aaaaaand in Other News:

Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire makes me laugh, ice cream vendors at the fair take a shittastically long time, and did you know MCR sang Under Pressure with the used? Da-uhm.

AND LITTLEKURIBOH UPDATED CR@PSULE MONSTERS! "Where is the new episode? Where is the new episode?" "Ohhh, you must be LittleKuriboh's overly-demanding fanbase." AND HE MADE A FLIGHT OF THE CONCHORDS REFERENCE!!! Silly LittleKuriboh, Tatsuha is the Boom King, not Tristan.

Last night I had this really weird dream that kept referring to the same thing over and over again. For once it was actually something that didn't make sense... but still made sense.

... does that make sense? Whatever. Anyway.

It was about some long-haired girl getting hanged over and over again.

She looked real enough although it almost looked like she'd been drawn with an art pencil at the same time and there was something wrong with her left arm. She was wearing a small dress and her hair was kind of dirty and so was the rest of her body.

She had to climb up the hanging post because they (whoever they were) didn't hang people in the tradition sense. And at one point as she was climbing up the post her dress got caught and I helped her free it, because at the time I didn't know she was about to die.

Then she was hanged over and over and it was really scary. It was like it was taken from a different angle each time and I remember yelling something before waking up. Eeeee, it was creepy.

I think it means that something big is about to happen or just that I'm a lousy and unaware protector. It sure made me feel like it when I unsnagged her dress. I try to make it my duty to protect everyone close to me but I can't help everyone all the time. Especially if I'm unaware about something. So I think that's why even if some people bother me I still want to be there for them because I don't want it to be my fault if something happens to them. Sometimes I wonder if I spend too much time protecting other people and not enough protecting myself. But that can't be true because for the most part I feel pretty secure and strong, but sometimes I don't think I really feel that way.

Maybe tonight I can save that long haired girl. I hope so, because this is one of those dreams I don't think I'm going to be able to shake for a while.

No more burritos before bed

Will & Grace. Gay guys, red heads, and drunkard? Just sort of makes other sitcoms seem like trash.

The most romantic thing I've done for someone was pull their head out of the clouds and tell them to wake the fuck up and smell the coffee.

... I mean, send them flowers. Yes... flowers...